We all have people in our lives that we care for and appreciate. We appreciate a loved one listening to us when we need someone to talk to. We appreciate that friend telling us the truth when no one else would. We appreciate family being there in our times of need. A lady appreciates a man who’s a gentleman. A gentleman appreciates a woman who’s a lady.
But have you ever felt that moment when the appreciation of luxury turns into expectation? Recently I’ve had a friend make complaints that their significant other no longer appreciates the little special things or those memorable moments that material things can not capture. Those moments that last a lifetime and embed themselves in your mind and heart for eternity. They feel the sincerity and surprise element of giving their companion a sumptuous gift is no longer there, but instead replaced with a “what else” or “what’s next” attitude.
When you develop a pattern of behaviors of any kind it become what’s expected of you. When or if the pattern changes you create suspicion. In any type of relationship consistent behavior can cause expectation. The lady expects the man to be a gentleman and vice versa because their behavior and everything about them has always displayed that. When a friend calls every year to wish you happy birthday or your significant other sends you flowers once a week you appreciate these things but you also grow to expect them. Appreciation can lead to expectation.
Expressing your gratitude to someone for something as small an opening the car door to being taken to the finest restaurant in town should be the same. There should be a sincere feeling of thanks. In a relationship, when you lose appreciation for the smaller things and trade it in for expectation of the more luxurious things you minimize the desire for an individual to create or provide either. Expectation without appreciation is undesirable in any relationship.
A simple “thank you” with any kind gesture of any measure goes a long way. Think of the possibility that the individual performing these kind gestures would stop replying “you’re welcome”. How would you feel as the receiver? How did they feel as the giver? We are expected to appreciate things.
Shared over a cup of tea,
...From My Thoughts To Yours, Jamara